Post by Seth Xavier on Dec 14, 2005 5:21:46 GMT -5
Who am I?
I am Seth Xavier.
Who is that?
Good question.
I don’t know who I am these days. I feel nameless.
I am now a professional wrestler.
When did I even begin to like wrestling?
I don’t know. But I just kind of became a wrestler. I can’t remember when it happened. I can only say that it happened.
Do I want to become a legend in this business or is it just for the money?
Do I want to leave a legacy here or just get my paycheck?
Will I become an Icon?
Will I be a hero?
Will I spit in the face of everyone who cheers me?
Will I turn my back on those who try to help me?
All these questions and no direction.
I have no direction.
I have no path.
I am lost. Or maybe I am not.
Maybe I am at the beginning of the maze. I haven’t even begun my journey.
That is it. My path is mine to make.
I will decide on all these questions as I embark on my tour of duty.
Valor. My first tour.
A name meaning courage.
How fitting as I am going down a path shrouded by mystery.
How ironic that I will start the story of my life here.
I will need courage to go down that path.
I will need Valor to write my story the way I want it to be written.
Valor.
I am Seth Xavier.
This is the beginning of everything.
The sun shines brightly. But the cold remains. Sixty degrees in southern California, is not very well received even in December. The beaches are empty. No one swims, no one surfs. It is a ghost town so to speak. Usually the beaches would still be occupied but for one reason or another they are not. Only two single people stand on the shore. A man and a woman. Not boyfriend and girlfriend but brother and sister. The man stands staring out at the ocean. The woman does the same. Seth Xavier, the man of our focus. The man who story will be told. Rena Xavier, the younger sister of Seth. She stands a foot shorter than her brother barely reaching a couple inches taller than five foot. She isn’t a knockout but most people aren’t. She is family. She is Seth’s family. He turns and looks down at his younger sibling. The two have always been close. They were the black sheep of the family. Rena the youngest of four, and Seth the second youngest of four. Neither consorted much with the two older siblings. Neither still do now. She looks up at her brother with a look of family love.
“So when do you leave?”
Seth smiles at his sister’s question.
“In a couple of hours.”
Rena frowns. Adapting to change was never her strong suit, that was always Seth’s.
“I still can’t understand why you became a professional wrestler.”
Seth shrugs.
“Me either. I don’t even recall the day I began my training. It just kinda happened. I don’t even know if I will enjoy it. It feels like it is just something I am doing. No real purpose, no goal. It doesn’t even feel like a job. It is just something.”
“I don’t understand why you can’t do something else. If it has no meaning, why do you have to leave because of it?”
Seth stares at his sister. She had always relied on him. He was always her rock. He helped her when she needed it. He had no intention of that changing now. But he had always relied on her too. But in a more indirect way. He always relied on her to need him. She is now 22, he is 26, time for him to do something with his life. Do something for himself. Do something without Rena. Maybe that is why he is doing this?
“I don’t have an answer for you.”
Rena grabs him arm and pulls down pleading.
“Then stay.”
“No. I don’t feel that is the way to go. I don’t know if this is the way either but I know I got to get out of Venice Beach. This is not for me. I don’t surf, I don’t skate, I don’t swim. I don’t even like it here. I don’t have the desire to piss away my life here.”
“Are you saying that I do? I love this place, it is my home.”
“I am sorry things are going down like this. You and I are family. Me leaving won’t change that. I will not be gone forever.”
Rena’s expression grows even sadder.
“It seems like you are.”
“I am sorry.”
Seth wraps his arms around his sister. They hug.
“Are you going to stop by Scott or Travis’s house before you leave?”
The two older Xavier kids, Scott was the oldest at 34, and Travis follows at 32. Neither are as close as Seth and Rena are but most people are not. Scott and Travis always looked out for Seth because he was family but never much more than that.
“Probably not. I haven’t spoken to either one in a couple of weeks. I am not sure they even know about my job in Valor.”
The two let of each other and stare at one another again.
“I told them a few days after you told me.”
Rena always tried to become closer with her oldest brothers. The age gap just always hindered it. The older Xavier kids always cared more about Rena than Seth. So it came as no surprise that she told them. It also came as no surprise that neither Travis nor Scott bothered to call Seth about any of this.
“What did they say about it?”
“Scott wished you good luck, and Travis was a little skeptical. He didn’t believe me at first and then when he did he thought the whole idea was a little ludicrous.”
It was no surprise at all.
“They haven’t called me or anything not that I am shocked. I guess they don’t care. To be honest I don’t care that they don’t. It is nothing new.”
“But they are family.”
“They are not family like us though. I don’t want to argue with you before I leave. I want to leave on a good note not a bad.”
Tears swell up in the eyes of Rena.
“I guess this is good bye then.”
Seth pauses.
“I guess so. Only for now.”
The two hug again. The last hug amongst family for a long time. The sun shone brightly that day but the cold just grew stronger. The heat of a family dimmed. The fire within one man grew. Seth Xavier, next Valor Superstar, or next Valor Jobber?
I am Seth Xavier.
Who is that?
Good question.
I don’t know who I am these days. I feel nameless.
I am now a professional wrestler.
When did I even begin to like wrestling?
I don’t know. But I just kind of became a wrestler. I can’t remember when it happened. I can only say that it happened.
Do I want to become a legend in this business or is it just for the money?
Do I want to leave a legacy here or just get my paycheck?
Will I become an Icon?
Will I be a hero?
Will I spit in the face of everyone who cheers me?
Will I turn my back on those who try to help me?
All these questions and no direction.
I have no direction.
I have no path.
I am lost. Or maybe I am not.
Maybe I am at the beginning of the maze. I haven’t even begun my journey.
That is it. My path is mine to make.
I will decide on all these questions as I embark on my tour of duty.
Valor. My first tour.
A name meaning courage.
How fitting as I am going down a path shrouded by mystery.
How ironic that I will start the story of my life here.
I will need courage to go down that path.
I will need Valor to write my story the way I want it to be written.
Valor.
I am Seth Xavier.
This is the beginning of everything.
/////////////////////////
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/////////////////////////
The sun shines brightly. But the cold remains. Sixty degrees in southern California, is not very well received even in December. The beaches are empty. No one swims, no one surfs. It is a ghost town so to speak. Usually the beaches would still be occupied but for one reason or another they are not. Only two single people stand on the shore. A man and a woman. Not boyfriend and girlfriend but brother and sister. The man stands staring out at the ocean. The woman does the same. Seth Xavier, the man of our focus. The man who story will be told. Rena Xavier, the younger sister of Seth. She stands a foot shorter than her brother barely reaching a couple inches taller than five foot. She isn’t a knockout but most people aren’t. She is family. She is Seth’s family. He turns and looks down at his younger sibling. The two have always been close. They were the black sheep of the family. Rena the youngest of four, and Seth the second youngest of four. Neither consorted much with the two older siblings. Neither still do now. She looks up at her brother with a look of family love.
“So when do you leave?”
Seth smiles at his sister’s question.
“In a couple of hours.”
Rena frowns. Adapting to change was never her strong suit, that was always Seth’s.
“I still can’t understand why you became a professional wrestler.”
Seth shrugs.
“Me either. I don’t even recall the day I began my training. It just kinda happened. I don’t even know if I will enjoy it. It feels like it is just something I am doing. No real purpose, no goal. It doesn’t even feel like a job. It is just something.”
“I don’t understand why you can’t do something else. If it has no meaning, why do you have to leave because of it?”
Seth stares at his sister. She had always relied on him. He was always her rock. He helped her when she needed it. He had no intention of that changing now. But he had always relied on her too. But in a more indirect way. He always relied on her to need him. She is now 22, he is 26, time for him to do something with his life. Do something for himself. Do something without Rena. Maybe that is why he is doing this?
“I don’t have an answer for you.”
Rena grabs him arm and pulls down pleading.
“Then stay.”
“No. I don’t feel that is the way to go. I don’t know if this is the way either but I know I got to get out of Venice Beach. This is not for me. I don’t surf, I don’t skate, I don’t swim. I don’t even like it here. I don’t have the desire to piss away my life here.”
“Are you saying that I do? I love this place, it is my home.”
“I am sorry things are going down like this. You and I are family. Me leaving won’t change that. I will not be gone forever.”
Rena’s expression grows even sadder.
“It seems like you are.”
“I am sorry.”
Seth wraps his arms around his sister. They hug.
“Are you going to stop by Scott or Travis’s house before you leave?”
The two older Xavier kids, Scott was the oldest at 34, and Travis follows at 32. Neither are as close as Seth and Rena are but most people are not. Scott and Travis always looked out for Seth because he was family but never much more than that.
“Probably not. I haven’t spoken to either one in a couple of weeks. I am not sure they even know about my job in Valor.”
The two let of each other and stare at one another again.
“I told them a few days after you told me.”
Rena always tried to become closer with her oldest brothers. The age gap just always hindered it. The older Xavier kids always cared more about Rena than Seth. So it came as no surprise that she told them. It also came as no surprise that neither Travis nor Scott bothered to call Seth about any of this.
“What did they say about it?”
“Scott wished you good luck, and Travis was a little skeptical. He didn’t believe me at first and then when he did he thought the whole idea was a little ludicrous.”
It was no surprise at all.
“They haven’t called me or anything not that I am shocked. I guess they don’t care. To be honest I don’t care that they don’t. It is nothing new.”
“But they are family.”
“They are not family like us though. I don’t want to argue with you before I leave. I want to leave on a good note not a bad.”
Tears swell up in the eyes of Rena.
“I guess this is good bye then.”
Seth pauses.
“I guess so. Only for now.”
The two hug again. The last hug amongst family for a long time. The sun shone brightly that day but the cold just grew stronger. The heat of a family dimmed. The fire within one man grew. Seth Xavier, next Valor Superstar, or next Valor Jobber?
