Post by Seth Xavier on Dec 31, 2005 19:32:12 GMT -5
Just over 24 hours left before I face Morbid Angel again. This time the result will be different.
I will not let him get to me.
He will not scare me.
I will not lose to him.
This time will be different.
This time I have a very different mindset about the whole thing.
That means all the difference.
It means that Seth Xavier will win.
King…
Enigmatic King…
He is unlike anyone I have ever met before.
Something about the guy just draws me to him.
His offer to guide me intrigues me.
Maybe it is my destiny to follow this man.
He is very charismatic.
He is very intelligent.
He is very interesting.
King…
Enigmatic King…
The man to guide me to beyond where I thought I could go.
But there is something about this guy.
Something I can quite figure out.
There is just something odd about this whole thing.
I will focus on that later.
Right now, it is time for another glimpse into evil…
“I once was lost. Then a man came to me. He brought me to the light. Or at least what I thought was the light. He taught me many things. I learned to forget the past. I realized that to succeed at life, you must not accept fear. You must block it out. You must learn to inspire it. Morbid Angel has mastered this in your case. He has inspired fear into you. He thrives off of it. For you to win your match, you must eliminate that fear. You must make him fear you. Forget that he beat you. It was one match, that wasn’t for anything important. That match had no relevance at all in the scheme of things. This one does. This one is the match that determines your future in the company, in wrestling in general. You must forget what has been taught to you in the past. Can you do that? Can you embrace what I teach you without question? Are you ready for this new endeavor?”
I stare at King, pondering his questions. Am I ready? I need to be. But am I? I think so. No, I know so. If I am to overcome someone like Morbid Angel, if I am to overcome future opponents like him, I must ready. I am ready.
“I am ready.”
There is that grin of his. It is like a mix of confidence and something hidden. He is hiding something from me, but I don’t’ know what. Honestly, I don’t care. I am just enthralled by this opportunity to become what I have desired since my first match. To be on top. I almost gave up on that because of the pay per view. Now I rectify that mistake.
“I am ready to listen to what you are willing to teach me.”
“That is what I wanted to hear. Seth Xavier, I will take you to the top of the world if you let me.”
Intriguing.
“But we must take baby steps to get there. You must first be able to get past Morbid Angel. You must be able to make him understand that you are to be taken lightly. He is already considering you a pushover, someone meant to lose. You don’t want to lose do you?”
“Of course not. I want to beat him. I want to win.”
“Just win?”
What more is there than winning? King continues before I can verbalize my thought.
“He is looking to take something from you. He is looking to beat you within an inch of your life. He is looking to set you on the path of losing. I said that match at the pay per view was not relevant. It isn’t at the moment. But if you lose, it will become relevant. Everyone loses; it is keeping from becoming a habit that matters. You have to make sure you don’t make it a habit, or you will remain a nobody in this industry. You cannot let him do what he wants to do you. You must do that to him. You must do more than just win. You must make him realize that you are Seth Xavier, you are his superior. It will send a message to the company that they are inferior to you.”
“You want me to beat him till I can’t do it anymore?”
His mouth curls, he says nothing. That says it all. He wants me to hurt Angel. He wants me to become like Morbid. But why? Why do I want to be like him? I don’t want to be like him. But is that what it takes to become a superstar in this company? I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t want to show my doubt to King. He has faith in me. He wants me to succeed. It feels good to have someone like that. To have someone believe in me. Rena didn’t believe in me. That was something that shook my confidence at first. Then losing for the first time destroyed it. I guess everyone is affected though by that first loss.
“I don’t know if I can do that. I am not like Morbid Angel in the slightest. I am not evil. I am not hateful. I don’t want to hurt people when I don’t have to.”
“You don’t have to be evil to do that. It is all about business. It is what will help climb that ladder up to the top. Don’t you want to be the next Eric Hardcastle?”
Eric Hardcastle, the Prodigal Messiah, the heavyweight champion of Valor. The top dog in the company. Do I want to be like him? Do I want to be on top? Yes to both. I want to everyone else looking up at me.
“I want everyone to look up at me. But I am just not sure about these tactics. Isn’t there some other way to get there? I don’t remember Hardcastle doing this to get there."
“Of course not. He took a different path. He wasn’t in the same situation that you were in. But his path leads to the same place that yours leads to. Yours is just easier to climb. Yours will take you to greater heights than his ever will. I can lead you to the top of the world. But you must first prove you are willing.”
I am unsure. I have doubts. King stares at me with piercing eyes. He isn’t smiling, just a look of absolute seriousness. It as if he is looking into my soul. I must overcome my doubts. I must have faith in King. As if the man can read my thoughts, he grins again. I don’t say anything, he continues as if he knew my answer to begin with.
“You will kick his teeth down his throat. You will be relentless in your assault on him.”
I say nothing. I don’t know what to say, I just nod.
“Say it.”
“I will kick his teeth down his throat. I will be relentless in my assault on him. I will break his neck. I will spike his head into the mat to the point where he will not remember what has happened. He will awake and remember nothing but the pain I inflicted upon him. He will remember that it was Seth Xavier that did that to him. He will remember that he lost to me. I will have my chance to shine on his behalf. He will know that I have risen above him. That I am the better one. That I am better than everyone.”
The words flow out as if I was possessed. I don’t have any control over myself now. King just smiles and nods. He obviously loves this.
“I will rise above everyone in this fed. I will become greater than Morbid, Pohatu, Will Dinero, and Havok. I will attain a level of success above Immune, Martin Paine, and Zmaster. I will become a bigger icon than Eric Hardcastle and Brandon Bailey. I am will become the one who stands at the top of the world and laughs at everyone below him. I will be that everyone looks up too. I will set standard that no one but me can live up to.”
The arrogance in my words shock me. I stop spewing my praises and sit in amazement. I don’t recall what just happened but I was not myself. I was someone else. I look at King, he is laughing. He stops and returns a look at me. He grins.
“That is the attitude you need that is perfect. You remind me of myself, when I wrestled.”
I remind him of himself? Who is this King? Whoever he is, he is leading me down a path I am unsure I can go down. But he says it is a path to the top. How can I trust him that it is? I stare at him. His eyes deceive me. They show that he cares, but I get the feeling that he has his own motives. But can I really pass up the opportunity to get to the top? No matter what the cost? I don’t know the answers to these questions. King, Enigmatic King, I will follow you. I have to trust you. I have to reach the top somehow. I have to become the next Eric Hardcastle someday. I won’t let myself fail. King, I will follow you.[/i][/b]
I will not let him get to me.
He will not scare me.
I will not lose to him.
This time will be different.
This time I have a very different mindset about the whole thing.
That means all the difference.
It means that Seth Xavier will win.
King…
Enigmatic King…
He is unlike anyone I have ever met before.
Something about the guy just draws me to him.
His offer to guide me intrigues me.
Maybe it is my destiny to follow this man.
He is very charismatic.
He is very intelligent.
He is very interesting.
King…
Enigmatic King…
The man to guide me to beyond where I thought I could go.
But there is something about this guy.
Something I can quite figure out.
There is just something odd about this whole thing.
I will focus on that later.
Right now, it is time for another glimpse into evil…
/////////////////////////
/////////////////////////
/////////////////////////
“I once was lost. Then a man came to me. He brought me to the light. Or at least what I thought was the light. He taught me many things. I learned to forget the past. I realized that to succeed at life, you must not accept fear. You must block it out. You must learn to inspire it. Morbid Angel has mastered this in your case. He has inspired fear into you. He thrives off of it. For you to win your match, you must eliminate that fear. You must make him fear you. Forget that he beat you. It was one match, that wasn’t for anything important. That match had no relevance at all in the scheme of things. This one does. This one is the match that determines your future in the company, in wrestling in general. You must forget what has been taught to you in the past. Can you do that? Can you embrace what I teach you without question? Are you ready for this new endeavor?”
I stare at King, pondering his questions. Am I ready? I need to be. But am I? I think so. No, I know so. If I am to overcome someone like Morbid Angel, if I am to overcome future opponents like him, I must ready. I am ready.
“I am ready.”
There is that grin of his. It is like a mix of confidence and something hidden. He is hiding something from me, but I don’t’ know what. Honestly, I don’t care. I am just enthralled by this opportunity to become what I have desired since my first match. To be on top. I almost gave up on that because of the pay per view. Now I rectify that mistake.
“I am ready to listen to what you are willing to teach me.”
“That is what I wanted to hear. Seth Xavier, I will take you to the top of the world if you let me.”
Intriguing.
“But we must take baby steps to get there. You must first be able to get past Morbid Angel. You must be able to make him understand that you are to be taken lightly. He is already considering you a pushover, someone meant to lose. You don’t want to lose do you?”
“Of course not. I want to beat him. I want to win.”
“Just win?”
What more is there than winning? King continues before I can verbalize my thought.
“He is looking to take something from you. He is looking to beat you within an inch of your life. He is looking to set you on the path of losing. I said that match at the pay per view was not relevant. It isn’t at the moment. But if you lose, it will become relevant. Everyone loses; it is keeping from becoming a habit that matters. You have to make sure you don’t make it a habit, or you will remain a nobody in this industry. You cannot let him do what he wants to do you. You must do that to him. You must do more than just win. You must make him realize that you are Seth Xavier, you are his superior. It will send a message to the company that they are inferior to you.”
“You want me to beat him till I can’t do it anymore?”
His mouth curls, he says nothing. That says it all. He wants me to hurt Angel. He wants me to become like Morbid. But why? Why do I want to be like him? I don’t want to be like him. But is that what it takes to become a superstar in this company? I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t want to show my doubt to King. He has faith in me. He wants me to succeed. It feels good to have someone like that. To have someone believe in me. Rena didn’t believe in me. That was something that shook my confidence at first. Then losing for the first time destroyed it. I guess everyone is affected though by that first loss.
“I don’t know if I can do that. I am not like Morbid Angel in the slightest. I am not evil. I am not hateful. I don’t want to hurt people when I don’t have to.”
“You don’t have to be evil to do that. It is all about business. It is what will help climb that ladder up to the top. Don’t you want to be the next Eric Hardcastle?”
Eric Hardcastle, the Prodigal Messiah, the heavyweight champion of Valor. The top dog in the company. Do I want to be like him? Do I want to be on top? Yes to both. I want to everyone else looking up at me.
“I want everyone to look up at me. But I am just not sure about these tactics. Isn’t there some other way to get there? I don’t remember Hardcastle doing this to get there."
“Of course not. He took a different path. He wasn’t in the same situation that you were in. But his path leads to the same place that yours leads to. Yours is just easier to climb. Yours will take you to greater heights than his ever will. I can lead you to the top of the world. But you must first prove you are willing.”
I am unsure. I have doubts. King stares at me with piercing eyes. He isn’t smiling, just a look of absolute seriousness. It as if he is looking into my soul. I must overcome my doubts. I must have faith in King. As if the man can read my thoughts, he grins again. I don’t say anything, he continues as if he knew my answer to begin with.
“You will kick his teeth down his throat. You will be relentless in your assault on him.”
I say nothing. I don’t know what to say, I just nod.
“Say it.”
“I will kick his teeth down his throat. I will be relentless in my assault on him. I will break his neck. I will spike his head into the mat to the point where he will not remember what has happened. He will awake and remember nothing but the pain I inflicted upon him. He will remember that it was Seth Xavier that did that to him. He will remember that he lost to me. I will have my chance to shine on his behalf. He will know that I have risen above him. That I am the better one. That I am better than everyone.”
The words flow out as if I was possessed. I don’t have any control over myself now. King just smiles and nods. He obviously loves this.
“I will rise above everyone in this fed. I will become greater than Morbid, Pohatu, Will Dinero, and Havok. I will attain a level of success above Immune, Martin Paine, and Zmaster. I will become a bigger icon than Eric Hardcastle and Brandon Bailey. I am will become the one who stands at the top of the world and laughs at everyone below him. I will be that everyone looks up too. I will set standard that no one but me can live up to.”
The arrogance in my words shock me. I stop spewing my praises and sit in amazement. I don’t recall what just happened but I was not myself. I was someone else. I look at King, he is laughing. He stops and returns a look at me. He grins.
“That is the attitude you need that is perfect. You remind me of myself, when I wrestled.”
I remind him of himself? Who is this King? Whoever he is, he is leading me down a path I am unsure I can go down. But he says it is a path to the top. How can I trust him that it is? I stare at him. His eyes deceive me. They show that he cares, but I get the feeling that he has his own motives. But can I really pass up the opportunity to get to the top? No matter what the cost? I don’t know the answers to these questions. King, Enigmatic King, I will follow you. I have to trust you. I have to reach the top somehow. I have to become the next Eric Hardcastle someday. I won’t let myself fail. King, I will follow you.[/i][/b]
